Sometimes I do ask myself what can I do to make things better in my workplace. Although alot of my staffs respect me, never raise their voice to me, scare of me and listen to me but they are too dependent on me all the time. I forced them from time to time to handle tough tasks and motive them all time to work harder, take challenges and sometimes helping them to cover problems that they made. But I do teach them lesson in hard way and even issue them warning letter to make them aware the importance of responsibility in work, liability of the task being given and to be more vigilant during at work. But they choose to ignore all these; take things too easy, take thing for granted and forget about their responsibility. We are very close to each other like big family. Although we argue and fights during work it never stop us being close like brothers and big family. Today... I am so disappointed with 1 of them who is my favorite staff. I shouted at him and demanded his explanation for a big trouble he has made. He was arguing with me; insisted he is correct and the quantity he tallied during 1 of the task given to him is correctly calculated and witness by him at all time. But now, client is coming to us claiming there are excessive quantity submitted instead of the original request. I was stunt and mad over what happened. Despite of my advice and push, he takes things easily and ignore the importance of his task. He is searching all the excuses he can when I questioned him and manipulating the facts when I concluded and discovered his wrong doing and careless. I was in low term when talking to him but ended up shouting at him with strong words. Best part is no one dare to talk to me when I started to raise my voice. I am so firm with the conclusion and listing it out what mistakes he had done. I am so disappointed with this but at the same time searching for ways to settle this simplest way I can to avoid any serious action that might be taken against him. But with the current situation whereby 'war' among 'DM and 'EVP' fighting for the task I am handling, the existence of an insider in my office, involvement of the task with other LOB, I can no longer keep this silent but to make it official by alerting my top management and putting it in emails. I was so sad when writing the email and it is even worst when I receive phone calls from my DM. The funny part is, I sound like being interrogated instead of the person who is convicted guilty. I explained the situation and was told to take necessary action against him which includes termination of his service in my company. Seriously he deserved to be warned and suspended but if you talk about termination, I never agree with that. I tried to persuade him and giving him all the facts that termination is not a best solution as it is only discarding the experienced staff. No doubt he is careless most of the time and irresponsible, we should consider giving him chances to improve and make him realized the lost we have to bear with for what he has done for the day. But when I think of it over and over again for what I said, I feel strange because he has being working in my company for almost 12 years and have being acting irresponsible since the day 1 he joined. In fact he is my senior but somehow I am the one step ahead of him now. Do I need to reconsider what I am talking about? Anyway to me I rather take the challenge to change him and help him than causing him loosing a job. Even he is not married, he has parents to look after and a breadwinner in the family. I will not let him go. I am so tired and confused. I tried to talk and gives excuses after several attempt of pleasing that being turned down by my DM. I will call him again tomorrow to iron this out and to help my staff to retain his seat and job. I know that my DM is going to have big hit from the MD due to the silly insider in my office but I will give my very best to keep him a job. I'll pray for better tomorrow.
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