27.12.2010 - Monday Blue

It is a week before we venture into year 2011. I was hoping to have sweet week since this is the last week of the year. Although I knew I am going to be like, 'nothing to do' and continue checking my company email and following up things, still I just wish I can be at home doing something I want to without any disturbance. Life is so running so fast. It was like few years back and now it is going to another brand new year. I just hope that i can clear off my emails which is not hitting 300 unread. I am giving up getting updated on emails and soon I am going to get big scold by my boss for not following up things tightly. I am so tired and lazy. My body begin to show me aging especially having lack of sleep. I am expecting more challenges next year but question is will I be able to cope with it? Only GOD knows.

So, it is Monday and as usual everyone seems lazy and look tired. I am one of them; indeed. Nothing takes me that serious until I was told that I will need to be in KL for management meeting on 31st. I cursed none stop that time and was hoping I can just disappear awhile from my desk. Well, since it is a must getting frustrated over it wont cancel the trip. I swallow it deep down below and trying to get my things done before I have my meeting this New Year eve. What a Monday. Every Monday will surely gave me some surprises.

26.12.2010 - Keep it up Butterworth

I am surprised that there is a procession going on in Bagan Luar. Initially I was wondering what is going on and is there any Taoism activities going on that place. I was eager to look at it because I heard lion dance drumming and some other personnel who was there lingering around the food court area. I was having my dinner that time and feeling not pretty good with my stomach. After my meal, I stood at the road side hoping something to turns up. Everyone seems waiting at the road side and yet nothing appear after all. I am about to give up after waiting for 15 minutes; and finally it appears. There are about 20 decorated cars with lights, 4 to 5 groups of dragon dance, 4 to 5 groups of lion dance and about 6 to 7 team of Chinggay performing their best during the procession. The last event I've seen was 3 to 4 years back when we are in Penang having our dinner during the Christmas. That event is grand compared to this one. But although it is small I still feel proud to be there looking at the initiatives taken by those people to make Penang a wonderful and attractive place. I love Penang as much as others because this is the only state that makes me feel a real Malaysian.

Dragon Dance

Decorated cars

Music band

Decorated car - Megamall

Chinggay!

25.12.2010 - Christmas?

My diarrhea was getting bad and bad. I woke up few times a night due to sever stomach pain and diarrhea. I was so weak that day and decided to search for any clinic that would able to stop the pain and diarrhea. We went to Butterworth and entire Perai area but none of the clinic is open. It leaves me no choice but to the specialist centre to get it over. I decided to go to Bagan Specialist Hospital. I headed straight to the A&E section after registering at the main counter. I was asked to wait for the doctor for around 20~30 minutes because the doctor was away from the hospital. I was frustrated and shocked what is call A&E if there is no medical adviser/doctor available? If there is an emergency case then do they want the patient to wait until the doctor arrive? that is the silliest things I ever heard. A&E - Accident & Emergency! What is it call Emergency if there is no doctor standby? Fuck! The management should look into this seriously. If they think this is acceptable, then A&E should be change to C&W - Call & Wait; because you need to call the doctor and wait for them to arrive. And what the doctor did was... asking me if I want to admit. What the hell is this? don't you think she should have try to heal and stop the diarrhea than asking me if I want to admit hospital? am I so serious? or about to die? Disappointed! I rejected the offer and asked for medication; and was given 4 types of medicines and guess what it is without the pain killer. So, I have to bear for another night for the pain!

24.12.2010 - No more Ticket

I was in the plan to give mom a surprise by turning up in Singapore greeting her an early morning birthday wish. I tried to search for flight tickets and even coach. Unfortunately all of them are fully booked. Even if there is for some airline, it cost MYR890 for return trip; which I think it is not worth spending that much just to be filial son. I wanted to be with mom this year but with my work schedule, I am totally lost in time and recalling that I need to purchase a ticket. I never want anyone to help me on this nor my own sister. Sometimes it is better to spend my own money rather depending on other people helps. Although I know they are my siblings but to me this is me; I don't like to ask for something that I can afford for. Well, after days trying I was in the thought of getting myself a coach since there is no more hope for flights. I planned pretty well on eve that if I can grab a ticket, I will travel on that night after work. Once I got up early in the morning, things doesn't seems to work out. I got diarrhea! I thought it was awhile but 1 whole day. Well, my trip is not going to happen as I don't want to shit in the bus or to ask the driver to stop by just for me to go to toilet. Ridiculous. Rest is what I need.

22.12.2010 - Another Trip after Trips

Hmmm... I thought December was the resting month. Usually it is a slow month but to me this year, December is a nightmare. I was asked to be in Shah Alam again this week just attend an half and hour meeting with 1 of the giant retail hypermarket management. I thought I had enough last week meeting up some big car maker company and now again I was asked to be there again?? It was a very rush trip last week where I have to perform an audit, fly down the next day and on next Monday I have to perform another audit in Kedah. I was forced to complete last week report in 2 days and then keeping myself up to date on the meeting in KL. And then upon completion of Monday audit, I need to get that report done within 2 days. How am I going to catch up my emails and attending the meeting if I have so many things behind meeting datelines? Well do I have any choices? Yes unless if I choose to leave. So, leaving behind the Monday report, I was forced to travel down to Shah Alam along with my bosses in their car. The trip was a nightmare. I was dizzy and sick in the car. I guess it must be his driving; I mean my boss. We took 5 hours to reach KL and straight we attend the meeting as scheduled. It was a rush trip and I was too tired the night. I flew back the next day and again with this silly Airasia, my flight delayed from 455pm to 700pm. I am so tired this week. My audit report? Nah.. decide later... late or not I am too tired and need more rest.

15.12.2010 - Stressful Evening

I dislike having that kind of stress, I mean being sleepless and haunted of waking up early to catch my flight at 7am. It is my biggest mistakes by making arrangement at early morning flight. I was in the plan to sleep early around 1030pm but again time does not permits. I was having an audit the morning session and was taking it easily with the hope of getting myself free early to catch my sleep around 10. Unfortunately I was invited to join them for drink and dinner. Well it is pre-planned about months back so I just take this opportunity of getting myself released, at the same time getting myself drunk and sleepy. Well, it works quite well, I slept around 11pm. My cough woke me up around 12 and then I continue sleeping... Wish no more tomorrow!

14.12.2010 - Freaking Thursday

I just can't get rid of my Thursday trip. I just don't know why the hell I booked a day trip flight. Initially I thought having a day trip is much better but now I regret because I need to wake up at 430am just to catch the fucking flight at 7am. Seriously I don't know why I booked that flight for? I should have take flight a day before after finishing my audit straight to KL hotel stay 1 night and then meeting the next morning. Be honest I do feel being stupid something having that kind of thought of spend less for the company and travelling. I hate travelling and I hate my management. Just because of 1 silly audit meeting which takes approx. an hour, I have to struggle myself to fly down for the meeting and at the same time planning for management review meeting on the same day. It will be a very pack trip this Thursday meeting from morning till evening. I hate to have that scary feeling thinking of travelling early in the morning especially having the strange feeling of sleepy, no appetite, weird and mad. I just wish I can run my damn business that I don't need to wake up so early and get my butt on the plane!

13.12.2010 - Stressing Again

I hate this week so much. I was asked to travel down to KL on day trip. I am so weak and fall sick since last week but yet I still have to travel down this Thursday after an audit on Wednesday. I wish I can find a new job which is permanently station in 1 location without any travelling. Seriously I guess it is the weather that makes me feel odd. I have being having this strange flu and cough since last week. I tried to rest more and have more light foods but it doesn't seems to work. Jogging is making it even worst which I did it last weekend. Instead of having good sleep, I cannot sleep at all for the past 2 days. I was totally awake the whole night with strange weather - cold. I just turn on my fan at level one and air condition at the temperature of 25 degree which later turned off during mid night. I guess fever that makes me feel weird. However it was acknowledge by my colleague that mid night temperature is now weird and strange than before. I wish it is the end of the world but it never happens anyway. It is nice to have such weather but it really causes alot of change in my body. The tremendous change on the weather is killing me. I guess partly due to my ceased routine exercise. I wish I have more time to go for jog and rest. Hopefully nothing happen on Thursday because I can sense that I am going to fall very sick since I need to stress myself so much.

11.12.2010 - Home Cook again!

I slept until 1030 and was a but lazy to get change and working in office. I promised my assistant to have breakfast and lunch with her but I didn't make it. She is very mad at me when I message her that I am cooking at home and cannot make it for lunch. By the time I got myself ready, it is already 1130 and raining. I am so lazy that time and decided to scout around in the house looking for something to eat just to fill-up my stomach because I am so hungry. Bread loaf is finished! That is the only meal I wish for that time just to keep my noisy stomach filled. I check on my fridge if there is anything I can have and notice there are white carrot, some meat & bones, eggs, roasted pork and onion. I was uncertain if I should cook myself and have simple lunch and save my money from traveling down to my office just for meal and some minor works. I boiled white carrot soup, steam white rice and fry eggs that mixed with roasted pork and onion. It is not a something special but a simple food that makes me feel easy. Fast and tasty. Since I have some left over, I called my dearly girl friend who is about to finish her work at 1pm to drop by for lunch. She finally did and clean up the remaining. Nothing left over except soup which I asked her to keep some for my dinner. I love soup!

10.12.2010 - Healing + Gastric

I was so weak for the whole weak but it never stop me from getting my work done; both in office and at home. Unlikely before where mom is there for me at home helping things out and looking after me. Sis was right. The moment when we get sick, that is the time we feel being lonely the most. It is like feeling no one else in the world would ever bother much if I live or die. Seriously that is true. If I died midnight, I don't think anyone else would know until the day my corpse turn rotten where maggots and odors start filing the house. Fortunately the medicine doctor presribed was working well except with the side effects that really makes me feel irritating all day long. Gastric I mean! I should have notice it the day I got the medicine but with my dizziness, I got everything mixed up. i thought it was the white tablet that causes gastric pain unfortunately it is the red one that causes me pain. Whether pain or not pain, I still need to take it to stop that bloody fever from fluctuating. What I believe most is sleep more or get more rest to get well. I wish I have sleeping pill beside me. I can just sleep whole day and rest fullest.

07.12.2010 - Sick Man

I am sick again! It started with flu and then cold. I guess must be tired and less sleep lately. Work is piled up like mountain while house work is again back on my daily schedule. I start having headache wondering on how am I going to celebrate my CNY. I was told that mom might not be back and I have to go through myself alone in Malaysia. I was also told to be in Singapore during the Christmas to celebrate mom's birthday but I did not manage to grab my air ticket in timely manner. I just can't believe it that my work really occupy my time until I have forgotten that I need to reserve a seat to Singapore for mom's birthday. In fact I did not even thought that mom will be there for so long. What I know is that she will be there for 1 to 2 months during sister's confinement. Well nothing is predictable after all especially with my sister. She can make the whole world change anything she wants. Well known in our family. This time, I am so sick. My fever runs up and down, sleepless, body aching and extremely weak. Will visit my favorite doctor next day.

05.12.2010 - Home Alone again!

I have wonderful 2 weeks with mom, sis and Lucas. Now they are going to leave me again back to Singapore. Before, the house is crowded and full of happiness. I love going back home seeing everyone at home having dinner together and talking something non-stop. But now I am all alone again. Seeing them boarding thru the gate is really a heart breaking moment. Last time it is sister that leave us but now all of them is leaving me behind. Once I lost visual with them at the gate, I have that strange feeling; something like losing all my senses and direction. What I know is, life is so meaningless without family. What am I suppose to do now? I was so afraid to return home but there ain't solution for this. Once I reach home, the house is really like a mansion. Quiet and look odd. I keep myself busy whole day with cleaning and working at home. But the moment of being lonely and quiet is difficult to wash away. That night is the worst night I will ever have through out the month. Before, I was with sister at the living room watching TV while the little monster is making noises. Now it is totally a quiet place and empty. It is difficult to explain the feels. How I wish I am a heartless person who take things easy and make life crazy everyday. I fell to sleep around 12 being too tired.

01.12.2010 - Spend to Feel Better

It took 2 days and cost me MYR320 to make myself happy. The scratch and broken windscreen were corrected / replaced. I spend nothing for the wind screen replacement since it is under insurance coverage but cost me MYR320 for repainting the whole front bumper. Everything looks back to normal except my windscreen without original tint while there is a slight color variance since the car original color already almost 2 years. With that amount I spent, I return my car to the shop demanding them to re-look into this and finally it is fixed. Now I have to wait for another 2 weeks to fix tinted film on my wind screen. Not only that I just discovered that my car brake is generating some irritating noise; something like consistent friction on the brake disc. I suspect this could be the warping disc but is that possible for Toyota Corolla Altis 2009? Well I am going to send in for diagnosis to get the real result.