Seriously I didn't expect my schoolmate would tell me this. I was bored yesterday late evening and got myself on the net to look for some entertainment. Coincidently, my schoolmate online in MSN Messenger and message me. We have great talk until she asks me some question that I never expect she will. During the year of 1996 to 1997 after my SPM exam, I date one of my schoomate who is very cute and lovely; Ms. Lin. She is a very quiet type person and never involve in anything that causes fights or arguement. She always lay low and quiet eventhough the class is full of voices and wars among boys and girls. I like her style for being quiet and gentle; while others in the class like whore and aliens, shouting like no body business and throwing vulgar words around.
I was asked if I still miss her and honestly, I did not miss her at all. I guess it is too long ago especially with bunch of relationship that doesn't work along; of course it has blow up my memory.
Indeed I was surprise why she ask me this question, thus makes me question her back why why and why. Initially she refused to tell me but after couple of time begging, she finally unveil the truth behind why she ask me this question. My ex. Ms Lin, she is married now with 2 wonderful children. But what disturbing her until now is, she still miss me, love me and wonder why I left her long years ago. I was shock and then sad over what happened in the past. It has been more than 13 years and I wonder why she still keep all this past story with her. I can't believe it that I have caused someone a broken heart until today waiting for my explanation. Now I know how silly I am when I was young.
I hope she reads my blog. I was mad that time when I left her. During school time, my mom and dad prohibit us to go out or mixing with stranger even until I started to work. It has become a habit for us until now.; whenever I want to go out, we usually ask permission from my parents and always have the feels like being prohibited at all although it is not. So, I had a date with this so call ex.gf and I was late because of long hours of work and parent's lecture for deciding to go out late evening. But it never stop me from going to see her; thus I took my ride there with my new bike and climb up to her 5 storey flat feeling excited to see her. But my arrival was not welcome at all because I was an hour late. Believe me I was chased away by her. I knock on her door and call up her name but her mom was on the desk doing something ignoring me and so sudden she came out from somewhere asking why I come to her house. I know it was late but I didn't want it to be late. I have work and parents to work on; and without allowing me to explain, she throw me those strong word in front of her family members while I am still standing behind her front grill door like stranger or some silly sales man. I was frustrated and I walk away feeling badly and decided to leave her without a word. I don't like people especially the one I love to mislead me and throw me all the shits before asking me what had happened that causes me late for an hour. Instead of asking, she gives me the cold water.
I was thinking of meeting her up or to add her in my MSN but after considering it again and again and of course with my schoolmate advise (her good friend) I decided to pass her the message than adding her into my MSN list. I hope she understand that the break off was caused by both of us and not only me; of course I am the main irresponsible person for not giving her the explanation but I think there is no need to do so because she didn't even allow me to do it in the first place. Well, since it is the past and she is already married, I do not see any reason why should I bug her life at this moment. I just hope she can let the past go and carry on with her new life than thinking about me again and again. Woman are strange. Although they are married, they still can miss their ex-bf. How could they marry someone while in their mind having someone else. Is that true that human will not marry the one they love most?
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