Sunday should be a great day for a rest. That is what thousand of people says. But my Sunday was a mess. My legs and body started to ache because of the jog. It was 710am in the morning; an unusual time to wake up during the weekend. Mom was almost ready while the rest still on the bed. The first thing I did was yawning, turning on my living hall ceiling fan and then lying straight on the sofa pretending I am awake. I was so tired and sleepy. 730am, I sent mom to our local government clinic for 1st time doctor visit. Mom have been taking heart & high blood medicine for the past 8 years and with the amount we spent on the medicine, we are trying to get them free form the government clinic since am paying for the taxes the equal price of 3 months of my salary. What really disappoint me is the service in the government institution is so fucked up. we waited for almost 4 hours for our turn which is 10 to 15 away from the first 1 that arrived in the clinic. I was told by mom that the doctor is chatting in the room while keeping the patient waiting. Worst of all, we were not given the exact medicine we bought with the reason it is expensive. What a fucking excuse.
After that, I sent mom to the temple again since she has to continue her prayers until late evening since a days before. By the time I reach home, wife and daughter is already waiting. This is when I started off being a maid. Of all these months, my wife is yet to know how to bath a baby. It leave me no choice but to bath my daughter, dress her up and do the rest in the house. I mean cleaning the kitchen, washing my toilet and hanging cloths after got them washed. I was so tiring and sleepy as I got insufficient rest since yesterday. By the time I am done, it is already 2pm. I took my shower and rest on the sofa. Before my eye closed (I am so fucking sleepy) I was asked to look after my daughter as my wife is going for shower. I thought of saying no but there is nothing much I can do. After that, we went out to settle our bills, lunch and then out to the mall to get them cheers. At the same time we dropped by at the afternoon market to buy some vegetables and meats for the week. While waiting for dinner, we rested at the nearest Starbucks and grab a glass of ice mocha.
Think of it, why am I doing things that is not what I wanted? once we finished our steamboat dinner, we return home and that time, it was dark night. Before I can get myself a clean wash, mom called and I have to pick her up. My day didn't just end like this. I wasn't satisfied with my life for the day without having my own sweet time. I tucked everyone in their room resting and spending my own time watching TV for a while and serving net. before I can get myself into my own time, my eye started to hint me how tired it is; I started to see things darky and spinning. Guess that is the alarm clock calling me to sleep. So that is how my day goes.
I keep asking myself, what is life all about? in old days I am doing something for the sake of mom and now it is for the 3 of them. I barely have my own time. Whenever I sacrifices my time for them, will they ever realized them and appreciate it? or they just think that it is my job / responsibility to do so? I am so sick of my life and wishing hard to leave and stay alone.
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